Almost done! Are you ready for thanksgiving break?

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My lesson this week for singing was great! I finally feel like I am back in the groove of things again. It was so bad that I do not remember the last time I went to all my classes all week, but I think I have found solid ground again! I even found myself wanting to practice and listened to the song "Once Upon a Dream" that we worked on last lesson together.

I love the flow of the song and it is just so beautiful! The way each note flows into the next and the entire song's message is just beautiful!! It is about wanting this person that you believed to be one way and in reality they aren't. It is so beautiful and I was so excited for my singing lesson this week!

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Walking into my lesson we had out regular pleasantries and hellos before we began our warmup. But this warmup felt different then how it usually does. I usually have no problem going through all the notes no matter what vowels we decide to start on. But this weeks lesson, I had a few voice cracks! It was embarrassing but more than that, it was interesting and I was wondering why that happened!  I found myself starting at the lower pitches on a "oo" as in "book", but as I would follow the piano up the little jumps from lower to higher I would have a crack.

I found out it was just my voice warming up and I was fighting up too much. My vocal chords could not relax with me worried about making my voice not crack. So once I relaxed and tried again, I was able to ascend and descend normally. I brought this up to my vocal teacher and how I felt weaker in my core. I explained that normally I can feel myself being supported by my stomach but today I couldn't. She said we would move onto the song and talk more about it.

So we would pull out our music to start going over everything and she would ask me to explain more in depth what I meant by not being supported. I said I know I am suppose to sing from my core but I feel weak today. I explained in the past that due to the medicine I was on that I was a weaker singer than I have been. She stopped me to say, "Emma, I think you should just sing instead of thinking just about the technique."

Hearing that stopped me in my tracks and made me tilt my head. I was confused? I just got back into lessons and I was ready to be taught but she said that we will put in technique as we grow with the song. If I never get comfortable with the song then how am I to put any flare and correct technique into it. She said today we were working on what the song sounded like in my voice and being comfortable 

So the rest of the class was just having fun with singing the song that I love. Just being there and singing was more than enough and that's okay!

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I was excited for my guitar lesson but more importantly I wanted to be honest with how I had been struggling mentally and how I was sorry it effected my practice, attendance, and mood. I found that being honest did not help anything and my guitar professor rather does not believe in mental health help. So my entire lesson was talking about how it was good I was sticking it out and still here but everyone has a hard time sometimes.

I would rather keep this one short and sweet because I still do not know what to think about it. I am sorry for the rather short entrance, but I am currently at a loss of words...